Self-Hatred — Hidden Sin III
Before we go any deeper together, let us pray.
"Lord Jesus,
I want to thank You for how faithful & true You are.
Thank you that in You – there is no darkness at all.
Thank you that it's You, who cares about us.
It's You who cares for this dear reader specifically.
Thank you for the truth that they matter to You.
That they were made in Your image.
Thank You that You love us and pray for us every single day.
Thank You that Your heart is for our healing and freedom.
Thank You for dying for us that we may live.
Please Lord, anoint this writing with Your heart & Your will.
It is in Your name I pray.
Amen."
In the last part of this series I shared two fictional stories to help illustrate how self-hatred is actually planted in the heart of a person.
Inevitably, you have wrestled with – at least to some degree – the idea of being aware of the relational dynamics and circumstances around your mother as a fetus, developing in the womb.
I know it can seem far fetched when we think about it in the context of our modern culture with so much subliminal & not so subliminal programming about the life of babies in the womb.
Knowing just how important it is to base everything on scripture, I have been praying for The Lord to reveal more biblical proof to back up all that I've been sharing in this work.
About a week ago The Lord answered my prayers through highlighting an area in scripture where the circumstantial awareness of a baby – who was still in utero – was made abundantly clear.
It was so obvious, I don't know how I hadn't thought of it before.
Well… He just hadn't revealed it to me yet.
Isn’t it the truth that we truly are only blessed with revelation when The Lord Himself opens our eyes?
I want to share what He revealed to me.
In the book of Luke, the scriptures clearly indicate that a baby is indeed aware of their surroundings beyond the boundaries of their mother's womb.
Not only can a baby physically hear outside the womb while in utero, but they can even understand & respond to what they are hearing beyond the boundaries of the womb around them.
Luke 1:40-44
40 where Zechariah lived. She entered the house and greeted Elizabeth. 41 At the sound of Mary’s greeting, Elizabeth’s child leaped within her, and Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit. 42 Elizabeth gave a glad cry and exclaimed to Mary, “God has blessed you above all women, and your child is blessed. 43 Why am I so honored, that the mother of my Lord should visit me? 44 When I heard your greeting, the baby in my womb jumped for joy.
The Greek word used to describe that the baby in Elizabeth’s womb heard Mary's greeting is; akouó.
This word literally means to hear, to listen, & to understand.
Once the infant (who we know to be John the Baptist) perceived Mary's greeting, he leaped within his own mother's womb. This was just before she was filled with The Holy Spirit.
I believe the order of these words matter.
It does not say that Elizabeth was filled with The Holy Spirit and then John leaped. It clearly indicates that at hearing Mary's greeting, he then leaped.
Just below this, you can look at the literal text with the Greek words placed as they were originally written.
This image is a screenshot from the Bible Hub where I access the concordance for a more in depth study of The Word.
Inside the Bible Hub – at biblehub.com – you can find the root word and literal definition of each & every word in the scriptures by clicking on the numbers at the top of each word from either the Greek or Hebrew reference points.
Once you click on the numbers above the word itself, the website then takes you to the concordance for a more in depth understanding.
The root word for leaped here in the Greek is skirtaó, which means to leap, to jump, to exult.
The scripture clearly illustrates that while in utero we are aware of – at least to some degree – the dynamics and circumstances of our family of origin even before we are born.
When looking in the exhaustive concordance at the word skirtaó, it goes on to place the meaning defined as: leap (for joy), skip, bound.
“Akin to skairo (to skip); to jump, i.e. Sympathetically move (as the quickening of a fetus) – leap (for joy).”
In this passage of scripture, it is revealed that the baby within Elizabeth’s womb responded to Mary's greeting with joy.
The fetus within Elizabeth literally leaped for joy at the sound of Mary's voice.
In using The Word of God as our foundation for the idea that we can indeed hear, sense and respond while in utero, I want to ask you to consider…
How might a baby in the womb respond when they hear and feel – through stress hormones and chemicals in their mother's body – verbal, emotional or physical abuse?
How might a baby respond when they notice again and again that whenever dad comes into the room mom's stress response increases?
How might a baby respond when they hear their mother complain about their body all throughout their pregnancy with them?
Conversely, how might a baby respond to hearing their dad speak kindly to them while developing in the womb?
With each experience an unborn child perceives happening around them, there will be some sort of response.
There will be neural pathways forming, nervous system programing, heart/mind processing, and soulful sensing of the overall dynamics of life at home.
Of the world they will be born into.
I do want to encourage you to start to ponder and pray about your own time in utero – when The Lord was forming your inward parts in the dark of your mother's womb.
How did you respond to what you heard and sensed happening outside the boundaries of your own mother's womb?
What happened in your heart during those months?
That specific time in your life set the stage for the rest of your life and is an area worth exploration and healing.
It is where the deepest roots of your heart draw from if they are not tapped into The Living Water Himself.
This is also where you can find out exactly how your identity is displaced in improper ways.
If you are interested in going much deeper in this work – to learn exactly how to address the roots of self-hatred in your own life – so you can walk in your true identity & be reconciled to the fullness of His love, I want to encourage you.
The Lord most definitely has a path of restoration, hope & healing for you specifically.
You can literally rest assured that He will finish the good work He has started in you.
His Word promises it. Philippians 1:6
What The Lord has been leading me to build to address this specific kind of soul bondage might be just the resource He leads you to explore as you continue your own journey of healing and sanctification with Him.
Regardless of whether or not you feel led into what's ahead with all that, I'm just so thankful you are here and do pray this has been edifying for you.
God bless you so very much and as always, thank you for being here.
with love.
- Nicole Hope
